Thursday night...

I always wish I had the right things to say. I use my words to disguise my weaknesses, only for that disguise to disable me more prominently than any weaknesses ever could.

I only wish that I could take back the words I said months ago. Replace them with kinder, gentler things. But the words I regret will be the words that will blind me from happiness. I've never been capable of expressing how I feel. My attempts are always misrepresented, in turn leaving me to feel like a fool.

Here I find myself, sitting here alone, by the phone, waiting for a call that may never come, praying a prayer that never comes true, and crying the same tears that fall every time. After all the failures one would think I would learn. It's like I keep being told "you're meant to be alone" while I try to rule out fate. Hoping for the best and not at all being prepared for the worst.

I fell too hard, too fast, when all I wanted was something to last...