That before all this happened all I heard around town was: "Oh, he seems like an alright guy." "He's a really good person." "You guys would be great together."
Now that it's all said and done I haven't heard a good word about him. Here I am wondering why wouldn't anyone lead me to the truth before I started talking to him. All these little things about him are coming out of the woodwork. All these names and faces are saying things and all these truths are being revealed. It is true that the truth is always revealed in due time. I don't think people were out to hurt me by not telling me to back away. It is the fact of the matter that they knew I wouldn't listen and secondly, that I was so damn happy and they didn't want to take that away. Sometimes it's better to live in fantasy for awhile then come crashing down to a pile of bricks than to never experience that small piece of fantasy at all at whatever cost it may be.
I don't live with guilt and regret upon my shoulders. Every step in my path has been a lesson learnt. Have I done some pretty dumb things in my life, yes... Have I done a lot of amazing things, yes. I do believe that those amazing things outweigh the horrible choices. That's why I refuse to let anyone judge me, besides God himself, based upon those times I have failed.
Over and over I hear the same thing. "Maybe you should lower your standards. Start looking for guys that aren't so attractive." And why the hell should I lower my standards... If anything I should raise my standards. I'm not an ugly person. I deserve someone absolutely gorgeous and who will treat me alright. Now whether or not I find that person, at this juncture, it doesn't really matter, but I refuse to lower my standards. I know what I'm attracted to, I know what I want, and I never compromise. I'm sure as hell not going to compromise when it comes to someone that personally involved in my life.
Ok, this got nowhere fast...
Going to go watch the new Ghost Hunters episode.
OMG, Steve *drool*
Ghost Hunter Steve is one Steve that won't screw me over...
And if I do ever meet him. I will demand lots of hugs. And jokes. And more hugs.
*sigh* *drool* *sigh*
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