The Great Destroyer

People seem to disappear from your life just as quicky as they enter it. One minute they are the closest person to you, next minute the most distant. I've become quite accostomed to not having people remain in my life for an extended period of time. Therefore I cherish the friends who have become a facet in my life.
Looking back I wonder what would have happened if I had silenced the words. Bit my tongue and not given in to the inane emotions that dwelled inside. Even moreso lately I contemplate how I could have avoided destruction knowing what I know now and believe in the ideas I have adopted. I would not have experienced loss. I would not be sitting here right now wishing I had him as a friend and confidant, having a conversation, sharing a thought, a laugh, and a smile.

Emotions destroy.

They make intelligent people appear to be fools. They send you from the highest mountain crashing into the deepest sea. They work like a chain reaction, building one upon the other until combustion occurs. Hopefulness to happiness, happiness to adoration, adoration to disappointment, disappointment to sadness, sadness to anger. But unlike most chemical reactions this results in no product, nor does it create any fulfillment. Self actualization based on knowledge is that which creates fulfillment, not radical impulses based on emotion. Factual reality based claims are far more viable than claims based on emotional experiences. It is a fact that smoking relieves stress, and it is also a fact that smoking damages your health; an example of an emotional versus intellectual fact. It is a fact that emotions are soley a product of an interaction with an external stimulus creating several chemical reactions in the brain. Yet, we put so much value on these emotions. Why do we act out irrationally knowing that we will not acheive the desired outcome?

Our ability to make decisions is dependent upon remembering and identifying similar situations. When dealing with decisions that provoke emotion our cognitive abilities often become clouded with delusions of grandeur also known as the illusion-of-truth effect. It causes us to view an idea as being true even if we know the idea has been verified to be false. This effect occurs due to implicit memory. Our mind creates several types of memories, explicit and implicit being the two types that are generally associated with emotion. Implicit memories do not require conscious awareness of previous experiences, whereas explicit memories necessitate a conscious awareness of experience and knowledge. As a result, explicit memories involve higher brain functions which demand more time to process. Often certain stimuli, a certain word, event, or action, are necessary for the memory to occur. If the stimulus is not present, we may not consciously recognize a consequence involved in the action. Thus, the reason why we make these irrational decisions.

With that said, I do not ask anyone to adopt my theories and beliefs. If believing in love is what gets you through your day then more power to you. But just as I do not ask that you adopt my beliefs I do not feel it necessary for those who do not understand to try to "save" me from my thoughts. I refuse to cry out in vain feeling sorry for myself, I picked myself up, embraced the truth, and began to view the world with a realistic but also positive outlook.

It was easier letting go than holding on to dreams...